Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Chef's Whites: Sex and the Culinary Tradition

Hey guys, Desmond here, with a few thoughts I had earlier while watching Iron Chef...

I love to cook. With that in mind, it makes sense that I have many friends who, likewise, love to cook. One thing I often hear from friends is how much fun it can be to play in the kitchen. Perhaps it's the excitingly dangerous tools on the wall , the sensual heat of the oven, or the memory of exotic and spicy meals from days gone by. Whatever leads to this piqued interest, I find no shortage of friends, kinksters and otherwise, who find the idea of getting down and dirty in a well stocked kitchen a fantasy worth retelling.

For those of you who don't know me, it's important to mention here that I engage in D/s play. I identify as a Dom, and am rather proud of that fact. I love to wield power, and control those who wish to be controlled. I also think the kitchen can be one of the most exciting rooms in the house. My interests in the kitchen, however, are far from the ideas that I have heard time and time again. My interests are in the fascinating dynamic between the Chef and their Sous Chef.

Brigade de cuisine is a term used to describe the division of duties in a professional kitchen, creating a militaristic hierarchy, featuring the Chef at the top. Every single person in a well trained kitchen staff is working as an extra hand of the chef. Without them, he would not be able to create the elaborate dishes he is tasked with serving up. Without him, they would lack strong direction and leadership. If he gives an order, they are there to carry it out exactly to his liking, as they have come to learn by working with him. The best kitchen crews have spent years learning how to work with and for their chef.

Directly below the Chef sits the Sous Chef. In the absence of "Chef", the sous chef can often act in his place. For a lower line cook to disrespect their sous chef is tantamount to disrespecting their chef. Sous Chef is not a position without power, it is a spot reserved for the best of the best, with the most rewards, but also the most responsibility. It is, without question, still a subordinate role to the Chef.

The strong D/s dynamic between the Chef and Sous comes by necessity. Every second the sous spends questioning the chef is a second lost, so unwavering loyalty is demanded. They must trust each other completely, knowing how each works so as to best gauge timings of dishes. Chef needs to know that their Sous will get the jobs they delegate without needing to check in. The Sous, on the other hand, needs to know when it's appropriate to get the Chef's go-ahead on a particular piece of a dish, and when to use their own better judgement.

A chef holds absolute authority. If something is not done to their liking, it will be redone, and they don't care if you just spent an hour reducing those caramelized onions, how dare you waste an hour of the chef's valuable time, not to mention the onions. The mutual reliance on skill and efficiency between the two makes for one of the tightest bonds in the kitchen.

These facets of the relationship make me wonder why, when so many of my friends enjoy sex in the kitchen, more of them don't act out this sort of RP fantasy. People play with military scenes all the time, and this is not much different. With the exception of the skills required, which can be learned, there is not a very high barrier to entry, and it's arguably one of the most useful fetishes to learn to efficiency.

Spend an hour in the kitchen learning how to work with, and not just around your loved one. Find roles to fill and carry them with pride and confidence befitting them. Kitchen staff, like militia, come from a proud heritage, and to play their roles, you need to be a little willing to work along the way. But at the end of the night, you've got two playmates, wound-up from an hour of D/s that can be as intense or relaxed as you'd like, and a whole romantic meal between you and throwing your lover down right there on the kitchen floor. Say what you will about the delay, but sometimes waiting is worth it. And if it's not, dinner won't mind being left by itself for a bit while the chefs get frisky.

My friends can keep their old standby sex on the counter, I'm going to button up my whites and start barking orders. Now, where's my Sous Chef with that hollandaise?

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